This is the question that so many are asking themselves these days . . . in this economy.  There is no doubt that the cost of divorce can be astronomical.  But it doesn’t have to be.  The bottom line beyond the choice of any of the options below is this—the more amicable your divorce, the more cost effective it will be.  If you work together with your spouse regarding your divorce issues; that is, if you reach agreements regarding your children and regarding the division of your assets and debts, the cost of your divorce will be remarkably lower than a highly negotiated or litigated divorce.  Even if lawyers are retained by both parties, the parties can still work together within a collaborative law or even litigated process to resolve issues efficiently and economically.

When you file for divorce, you have options:

1. the kitchen table approach (pro se)
2. one party hires one lawyer and the other pro se
3. collaborative law
4. litigation

Kitchen Table Approach: Many these days will be seeking to file and complete the divorce themselves while sitting across the kitchen table from each other.  If the parties have agreed on conservatorship and possession of the children and have decided how they want to divide their property and assets, then pro se (without an attorney) parties may very well be able to successfully navigate the divorce process.  Often this will be the least expensive method for parties if both husband and wife are knowledgeable about Texas laws regarding rights, duties, possession, and support of children and if the parties understand their property and debts.  The parties must be careful before attempting this option to make sure they understand what they are agreeing to.  The Texas Young Lawyers Association has an online printable guide of the divorce process with forms–http://www.tyla.org/pdfs/2005ProSeDivorceENGLISH.pdf.  Note that this guide is a 2005 printing and will not have changes in the law since the time of its publication.

One Attorney: It is possible that one attorney, hired by one party, can assist the parties through the divorce process.  It is important to remember that only one party can be represented by the attorney and that attorney cannot represent both parties and cannot offer legal advice to the unrepresented party.  The unrepresented party must be careful before attempting this option to make sure that he or she understands the process, legal terms, and ultimately what is agreed to.  This option can be less costly because only one lawyer is being paid.  Where this process can be costly is when the unrepresented party doesn’t understand what he or she may be giving up and gives more than the party would have if he or she had been represented.

Collaborative Law (CL): Around the water cooler, I hear a great deal about the CL method being more expensive than other methods.  While it certainly may be more expensive than the Kitchen Table Approach or an option with one attorney, there is no doubt that there are many cost saving benefits to CL.  I often relate the divorce process to a three-legged stool—each of the legs containing an aspect of the process.  One leg being the emotional aspect, another the financial aspect, and the third the legal aspect.  These legs are equally important and if one is broken, the stool falls.  So it is not exactly fair to look at the CL process solely from the financial aspect—yet, we find that the CL process is far more cost-effective than a highly litigated case.  And parties do not have to walk into this option being 100% agreeable.  In fact, we find that most folks enter the CL process with the same fears, anxieties, stressors, and upsets with which they would enter the litigation process.  In the end, when the parties complete the CL process, we find that costs are preserved for all three legs of the stool.  For more information on collaborative law, visit http://www.foxlawtexas.com/family_law/collaborative_law.php.  Preserving these aspects divorce is priceless.

Litigation: A litigated divorce is a costly divorce.  Sometimes this option is the only option.  When the parties cannot work together to figure out what is best for their family, then they must leave it for the court to decide.  Often the process involves discovery, hearings, third party involvement such as a guardian ad litem (GAL) and/or psychologists, and ultimately a final trial.  All parts of this option, involve multiple hours of work on the part of the attorney and the client.  The client will be asked by the attorney to help with gathering documents for responding to discovery; the client may be ordered to meet with psychologists and/or GAL for child custody recommendations; the client will need to meet with the attorney to prepare testimony for depositions, hearings, and/or trial.  All of this time spent by the client on his/her divorce case, means hours away from work, from their children and from taking care of their health.  Therefore, there is not just a financial cost related to paying the attorney, the cost of a litigated divorce runs much deeper and will affect all aspects of a clients life.  Now, while I often say that the majority of litigated cases settle, the parties often do so only after working through the litigated process and only after spending great amounts of money on attorneys and away from work and their families.  While our firm litigates many cases a year, we counsel our clients to consider attempting to communicate with their spouses to reach a resolution.  Sometimes, however, the other party despite repeated efforts is just not willing or ready to work together and therefore, litigation is the only option.  And you very well may not want to or cannot bring yourself to work with your spouse during this process.  If you have been abused by your spouse, cheated on, or even abandoned by your spouse, or because of some other difficult reason, you may not be in the place to negotiate a resolution and in that case, allowing your attorney to navigate the process with you is your best option.

Again, bottom line—if you can work together, you will save not only money, you will save emotional costs and even legal costs.  When you and your spouse decide together what you want for your post-divorce family, you empower yourselves to choose rather than having a court decide for you.  If you cannot work together, you will want a lawyer who will educate you about the process, walk you through with caring and compassion, and advocate earnestly for your interests.